Meatguy and Shopgirl

Ben Human
3 min readMay 19, 2024
Photo by Julian Hanslmaier on Unsplash

I’ve said it before. Can I say it again? You are a joy and a delight to me. I fucking love you, she said.

I love you too, he wrote.

If only I was your shop clerk, she said. Would you pop in every day? How I would look forward to it. My coworkers would kid me about it and I’d blush every time I saw you. You would know.

How delicious that would be, to tease and surprise you, he said. I’d be your secret admirer back. Only I don’t notice these things.

Seriously, how are women not throwing themselves at you? She said. Maybe they do and you don’t see it. I’m just glad that I’ve had the chance to tell you that I’m crazy about you. Even if you didn’t like me back. I’d still be happy you knew.

I love this kind of love, he said. Free and uncomplicated and honest. We’re lucky, all else is detail.

Ugh, she said. LOL.

That’d be a good story. I’d want us to write it, he said. Two stories, from both viewpoints — her story in plain text, his in italics. For example:

Girl, store clerk, notices man. Crushes on him. Sure he knows, but does he? Tries to signal but shy. Gets teased for it.

Guy goes to grocery store, served by girl. Thinks, what friendly service! Pretty smile. But don’t mistake friendliness for anything.

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